Michael Phelp's Mom Wants To Delete Lindsay Lohan

If there was ever a better example of how deluded Lindsay Lohan is, we'd like to hear it. Despite apparently preferring the fairer sex these days, Lindsay has not been able to fully contain the heterosexual beast that lurks in her and has developed a liking for Olympic swimming champ Michael Phelps. And how does she intend to catch her slippery quarry? Through his mum of course...

Because yes, Lindsay, what more could a woman who has strived for 23 years to turn her son into the greatest Olympian of the modern age - a clean-living, teeth-gleaming, American pie-eating hero - want more than to set him up with depraved, confused, wanton, fame-hungry waste of skin than you.

We reckon you're in there!

When Lindsay learned that one of her friends, the comically named Billy Bush, was to interview Phelp's mum, the actress sent off a text asking him to ask Mrs Phelps to set up a meeting with her aquatic son.

Lindsay's message read: "Tell him he's fucking amazing, and I want to meet him."

Not surprisingly, Mrs Phelps was in no doubt what to do with the ill-thought-out missive...

When the interviewer showed the mother the text on air, he got the following response. Clearly horrified, Mrs Phelps said: "OK, Lindsay! - Delete! Delete! Delete!"

If only it was as easy to delete people as it is text messages.

HolyMoly